BETTER LIVING ...

... through chemistry.

So my three new doctors seem to have settled on a nine prescription regimen to keep my immune system from attacking and further scarring my lungs. Oh, for the good old days when I took a daily prozac after I found out she was taking my kids to Winnipeg. This is not chemotherapy level intervention, but these drugs do not like me. They don't like my brain. They don't like my stomach. They don't like my bones. They don't like each other. Fuck, they disdain coffee and hate the sun? In what sort of dystopian world do I not drink coffee and have to wear a burka to go outside? Two of my meds having fasting windows, but under no circumstances, can they be taken together. That's fun. One has to be taken with food. My favourite is the one that they don't want in your mouth for more than a few seconds. Then you can't lay down for any hour in case it burns your innards. That one is special and so yummy! So I was asking Gemini (Google's AI) a question about what can go with what ... and it starts asking me leading questions? Do you take a glyburide? What specifically are they treating with the prednisone. Do you want to list all your medications and your doctor's instructions? (Maybe?). I can help you build a 24 hour schedule? (Really?). Now we are having a conversation. "I often get up for a couple hours in the middle of the night, does that help keep this med away from this one? When would be the best time to get some remedial steps in, if I find myself behind way beneath my target? That sort of thing. Now, as Letterman would say "I see an opportunity for comedy!

This went on for a few rounds, but I'll give you gist of it:

Mitch: I like to have a couple of stiff ones after my nap. You know, a large scotch (Black Label) with a whole ounce of club soda and a four gigantic ice cubes in it?
Gemini: You are taking a very complex cocktail of strong potentially interacting medications. The consumption of alcohol of any kind should not be considered without the express permission from your health team.
Mitch: Well, they say I'm toast anyway, might as well party a bit.
Gemini: You condition is treatable and responds well to this course of immunosuppressants. However, strong spirits are not recommended while on most of these medications. Perhaps a single glass of wine or light beer might be allowed with permission from your doctor?
Mitch: OK. No hard stuff. But, if I am going to drink red wine, I will need to HIT THE BONG. Is 15:00 as good time for some Birthday Cake out of the old paper towel tube?
Now Gemini is doing a Micheal Jackson. "This AI is for information only. Please consult your doctor for specific recommendations re the use of alcohol or recreational drugs during your treatment."
I fantasize that somewhere in Texas a red light is flashing at an AI data centre. Having had my fun, it gives me a CSV file that goes straight into Excel. "Pretty slick" said one of my doctor's upon seeing it. My pharmacist was a bit pissy. Something about AI taking jobs away from people. I think he has been reading The Toronto Sun too much? Anyway, give that a try if you are trying to sort some timing out for multiple meds. Gemini can hold all the balls in the air at the same time. I can barely hold two.

We Are Watching

Jack Ryan - Ghost something or other. Money grab. The usual suspects but the script blows for (at least) the first half of the movie. It starts to get slightly better in the second half, but you have to be a fan of the franchise to get through that first hour.

Boy, you can only blame injuries for so long, but that, combined with a couple of superstar slumps means we are watching our Toronto Blue Jays (the #2 team in baseball last year) struggle for a wildcard spot. We had just eked our way back to .500 baseball and then promptly lost 7 out of 8 when this was written. It will only take one of the six teams within two games of them to go on a little run to leave them on the outside looking in at playoff time. I am not hopeful.

World Diving Competition - (I mean Cup). Soccer has made some well thought out rule changes that are slowly changing the game for the better. If a player is rolling around on the field in agony and emergency medical staff have to be summoned, then he is not allowed to pop up, run a four flat forty and score 45 seconds later. He has to exit the field for at least one full minute. Not that much to ask for ... considering that he just nearly died? Also, since time immemorial, there is nothing like ridicule from a girl, to get a guy back on his feet? Katia Garcia made World Cup history as the first hispanic woman to serve as the centre referee. I heard she was literally pointing and laughing at some Nederlands drama queen? Good for her. I think every time a player is gesticulating wildly on the way down or rolling around on the ground, it should get a quick peek from the video booth. "He felt the challenge and went down" should be a yellow card. I don't blame the refs but it is pretty obviously in slo-mo?

Our Optimum Week

So from 1.8 million points to six bucks worth in about six weeks. About half went directly or indirectly for landscaping supplies and the other half for groceries. So, I'm back to ground zero for July 1st. The goal will be to get back into seven figures by Christmas. Pretty crappy flyer, but not unexpected with Canada Day in the middle of the week. They know your NOW list is going to to be non-negotiable. Lots of things to track in the Offer. A whole new raft of the long term offers (LO in the chart). We will try and hit "doubles" and trigger these when those items go on sale. Overall Zehr's continuity at $300. It's a new month, so we will try and hit that as well. Here is your list:

De Minimis

Dictionary
de min-i-mis | adjective
too trivial or minor to merit consideration, especially in law

Too trivial or minor to merit consideration? This was a hogwash (but successful) effort to hurt small Canadian businesses by Pumpkinhead. For a hundred years, small shit could go across our shared border freely in both directions. It simply costs more to identify, track and collect the pennies on these these small dollar shipments than you actually collect. The limit for the past few years was $800. Of course nothing is too small or petty for the man baby sitting in the White House ... so small businesses on both sides of the border are hurt. They are hurt in another way that I had not realized until today.

I said last week, that I have to stay out of the sun. That goes for my one good eye as well. This medication can make the patient highly susceptible to cataracts. Wear UPF 50 wrap around eye protection at all times when outdoors in daylight. So, I Googled that and the gold standard for "wrap around sunglasses that fit over prescription glasses" is a company in California called Cocoon. So I ordered a pair. Wrong size. Just return them, pay the shipping the get another pair. Hi ho, Hi ho, to Canada Post we go ...

The guy at the counter in front front of me is there for ten minutes. Mumbling, cursing under his breath, shaking his head and finally my turn. "I need this shipped slowly and inexpensively but I do need a tracking number please". She looks at the address and shakes her head. This is going to California! Do you have the Sonos App loaded and the paperwork prepared? Remember the guy in front of you? Huh? Just step over this way. Now that the minimis law has been suspended, you just follow this simple process:

1) Scan this QR code, download Zonos Prepay App to create a Declaration ID and pre-pay any duties owed. BTW - Duty owed on an item being returned = $0.00
2) Now scan a second QR code, download the Canada Post sister app, fill out that form and take both screen prints of the two generated QR codes to the counter. Ten minutes.
3) So they scan the first code and you give a YES on a screen. I have told the truth and whole truth and nothing but the truth. No way a meth smuggler could defeat that high tech roadblock?
4) Then you have the normal conversation when shipping something. How fast do you want it to go? Do you want it tracked? If we lose it, do you care? If you do care, would you pay $7.95 you get your money back? You settle on the that and she inputs that into her system. Two minutes.
5) Now the other barcode. It sucks in the Customs Declaration from the first app and populates the Canada Post waybill. Now you get the second set of questions. Are you trying to smuggle The Morning After pill, novels on human rights, the history of slavery into the US of A? None of these things are allowing in the land of the free. Assault weapons, the more the merrier. Two minutes.
5) You pay, she hits print and the whole useless exercise goes down in the books as another example of Republicans removing red tape from businesses trying to do business. Fifteen minutes later, I leave the counter, mumbling, cursing under my breath ... just like the first guy.

N.B. - While it started much earlier than 1865, the term came into common use when civil war veterans needed to access their service records in Washington to qualify for disability pensions. These records were disorganized, voluminous and became synominous with bureaucracy. The records were bound together with ribbon. Guess what colour it was? Veterans called it "red tape"

Mitch & Maddie