Course Correction
In the 46 months I have been doing this, I have continually encouraged you, my friends, to provide comments, suggestions, & criticisms (constructive or otherwise). While my ego would suggest that I "nailed it" out of the gates, there is a sameness to the nudges I continually get from the cheap seats. these are common themes:
- the focus on grocery shopping with some commentary is backwards (DD)
- regular readers are there for my droll humour and marginal insights (RV)
- Optimum Prime was a questionable choice of brand name (PS)
- shopping lists are fine, but if I am generating to-do lists, make them shorter (DS)
Originally, I had wanted to get the word "optimum" into my brand name, but the global lust for all things Transformers since 2007 muddied the waters. I blame Megan Fox. A reviewer said that she was the best special effect in the movie. The algorithm got skewed when every teenage boy on the planet (and I) started typing into Google "hot girl from the Transformers movie." The word Optimum got caught in the crossfire. When I added the word Prime, it just made it worse. Luckily, I have owned the MitchzKitchen domain for some time. From the get go, it had been suggested that I go with that. Now, I am going to. To me, it has that Alice's Restaurant feel, and it represents how my sister and I grew up. The Dawsons, the Shannons, Aunt Gladys, Uncle Murray, all had vast kitchens, and it was where everything was done. Company and family sat in the kitchen. Dad tore down a wall and gave up a bedroom on Grove Hill to double the size of ours. I removed the wall between the kitchen and the living room shortly after buying this house. Kitchens are for banjos and laughter. Meals and debates. Cleaning smelts, washing morels, tears and tea towels. So more than anything, that's my brand. I want my newsletter to be like we are sitting at my house having a coffee or a beer. Something is on the stove or the barbecue. You drop by every Thursday; we talk about the latest outrage in the news. The crimes perpetrated on my tomatoes by "the rabbit." The deal I got on prime rib and the deal I didn't get at the lumber centre. That's my brand. That's what I'm going for. My thanks to you all for coming along so far.
The Loop (or lap)
Thirty years ago, this guy was trying to sell us a time-share condo. He was losing until he dropped a line that always stuck with me. "I can describe every room in every vacation resort on the planet. You walk in, bathroom on the left, closet on the right. A little stand for your suitcase. Then, on the right is a dresser with a TV on top. Straight ahead, a little table with two chairs in front of a sliding door. On the left, two double beds, end tables with a lamp on each one. What I am selling is a prepaid week at a fully furnished condominium. Two bathrooms, full kitchen, separate bedrooms." You can prepare your own breakfasts and pack lunches before you go to Disney! At night, you have bedrooms to put your children in?" Separate bedrooms?" That sales pitch cost me ten grand.
So, I can describe the layout of every grocery store in Ontario, and so can you, if you think about it? You walk in the front door and find yourself in the fruit and vegetable section. All those apples and oranges up front, the stereotypical grocer standing nearby sorting cucumbers. "Hey. It shouldn't take that long to sort a cucumber!" Nearby will be the ready-to-eat section: rotisserie chickens, pre-made sandwiches, sushi. Nearby will be the deli service counter and the bakery. Going across the back of the store, you might find the seafood counter, meat counter, fresh meats, then boxed meats, then dairy in the furthest corner of the store. They know you will need to go there so so they make you walk the length and breadth of the store ... twice. Down the far side is the frozen food section, then back along the front to the cash registers. Sound familiar? I can do you one better. Check out this site: https://www.spotitpublic.techiemaestro.com/
My store is Zehr's #39. Put that in the search field you get this:
How cool is that? That is my store! So paid subscribers can tell me their store number. As you may have noticed in my list last week, I am now coding for the section of the store where you will find each product. I sorted the list in a clockwise loop. You walk in the front door, hang a left. Do one lap "shopping the perimeter" (which is the other term I have heard for this strategy). Going down those interior aisles is where they get you, grazing like cattle (George Carlin). If Premium Plus salted-top soup crackers are on sale, go down that aisle, grab them, get out fast (LOL). Fifteen minutes later, you can be out the door, confident that you got all the best deals on the basics. Your to-do list is now shorter. QED (Well, not that easily). Thank you all for the suggestions.
So, that's the plan. I will have to talk to Rebel.com about something, and those DNS people about something, and then Ghost ... about something. That will all be painful as I don't speak that language. Luckily, I have smart friends. In the near future, you will see these changes in your in-basket.
Our Optimum Week
Last year, I wrote a piece on how I could live out of my freezer, pantry for months except for dairy and a few veggies. We are in week #1 of that experiment. I bought taco veggies, milk and cream for $35. Everything else this week came from stock. Hamburger, naan, hot Italian sausages, chicken, broccoli, cheese, eggs, preserves, a taco kit, and some canned goods. FYI - The February Costco flyer book sucks ass. The Zehr's flyer was not much better, but there was a fresh round of monthly Offers so I added the F&V and the seafood to your list. Here is this week's "Loop" (Lap?) sorted for Zehr's #39 (Eramosa & Stevenson in Guelph):
I gave you the Merchant Legend, the Source Legend, and the Lap Legend in your chart this one time. Going forward, it will just happen automagically.
We Are Watching
Killing Boksoon on Netflix - SWMBO does not like sub-titled movies. Period. Full Stop. Add to this she is knitting a complex pattern, following a chart and looking her hands. For her, it was two hours of Korean dialogue with occasional segments of gratuitous violence. Short version. Killing people is easy. Raising a teenage girl is hard. I really liked it. SWMBO did not. Four stars.
Lincoln Lawyer (Season Four) - Uh Oh. Writing went for a shit. They already renewed it for Season Five so don't expect a cancellation, but they will not get a sixth if they keep this up. I mean Connelly wrote them a superb book, but complete sections of dialogue and plot are not from there. It shows. They must think they can write better than the author who has sold 60 millions copies? They are wrong.
Rueben Bake
SWMBO will eat a Reuben sandwich if presented with no viable alternative. I found this on FB and cut it down for two.
4 slices pumpernickel, cut into 1/2 - inch cubes
200 g of thinly sliced pastrami or corned beef, roughly chopped
70 g sauerkraut (drain the life out of it)
200 g sliced Swiss cheese, reserve 3 slices, chop the rest
1/2 teaspoons caraway seeds
2 chopped dill pickles
1/2 cup milk & an egg, beaten
1/4 cup Thousand Islands dressing
* 1/4 cup mayonnaise, 2 tea relish, tea each of minced onion & ketchup, 1/2 tea
paprika, dash of lemon juice and salt
1 table yellow mustard (I like that PC Sweet With Heat variety
Preheat the oven to 350°F. Spray an 11×7-inch baking dish and build:
1. Bread cubes in the bottom
2. Chopped meat, sauerkraut, dills and a pinch of caraway seeds over the bread.
3. Cover with chopped Swiss
4. Repeat 1, 2 & 3,
5. Whisk together all the liquid ingredients.
6. Pour that evenly over the casserole.
7. Cover with the reserved slices of Swiss.
8. Cover with tin foil, tent it and bake for 30. Uncover; switch to broiler.
9. When golden, pull and rest for 10 minutes. Serve with a good German lager.
SWMBO Verdict: Hold the sauerkraut, hold the pickles, hold the milk and the egg, hold the mayo, hold the onion, hold the relish and the ketchup, hold the paprika and the lemon juice, hold the pumpernickel. Give me the pastrami with the melted Swiss on a normal piece of bread. Mustard is optional. It's a tough crowd around here.
... and finally
My "Place in Order" quiz from the Times last week generated another Ah Ha moment. I know that usually when you see the letters S - A - T - U - R in any old world language, they are talking about the planet. The visible planets (Mercury, Venus, Mars, Saturn & Jupiter) were part of everyday pop culture in ancient times. So the Romans named the 7th day of their week after Saturn, their god of agriculture and wealth. I never gave much thought to where Sunday came from?This quiz made it very clear that they are talking about the worship of the Sun. It makes sense, but that is some serious pagan shit right there on a day I associate with Christianity? A guy wearing mascara by the Nile or atop some Central American pyramid cutting the heart out of a live virgin? The pagans called it dies Solis, "day of the sun." How the heck does that get tied into the seventh day of the Christian week? The short answer is politics.
When Constantine ruled over the Roman Empire early in the 4th century, he wanted to promote his newly found faith. He was sneaky. In 321 A.D. he demoted Saturday to the 6th day of the week and legislated Sunday as the 7th day of rest. This strategically combined pagan sun-worshippers and Christians, who were already gathering that day each week to celebrate the day that God put his feet up. Slowly the lines blurred and monotheism grew rapidly over the next 500 years. SUNday. Who knew? "Hand me a virgin".
Mitch & Maddie
p.s. Here are the Super Bowl ads in case you are interested. #14 and #18 for my money https://www.nytimes.com/2026/02/06/arts/television/super-bowl-ads-ranked-2026.html?campaign_id=190&emc=edit_ufn_20260209&instance_id=170815&nl=from-the-times®i_id=94650430&segment_id=215008&user_id=2dc9789a04c7071e940d2c87c790c425