Pay The Lady

Mitch Fountain

15 Oct 2026 • 6 min read

Shortly after SYMBO made the move from Kap to Guelph, we started watching Storage Wars. Sixteen years, she has put up with me? Like any new relationship, working out "the money" had to be handled delicately, and our code for asking each other for money was "pay the lady" which was the tagline at the end of each episode. We must have done something right as she is the record holder for putting up with my schtick. I just assume the credit goes to her and not me.

That's just a roundabout way of asking you for a little financial help with my Mitchz Kitchen enterprise? It's time to "pay the lady" in our parlance. I had always planned to move this blog under a small paywall. I foolishly thought my shopping content would be the hook, but it turns out that you, my readers, value the ramblings of a retired janitor, but disdain his efforts to save you money on groceries (more on that next week). Only a handful of you actively use my shopping strategies. Weird but flattering I suppose? I am going to suggest that you all have received twenty-six bucks worth of value over the past two years. In the meantime, publishing these is not free. You can get The New York Times for twelve bucks a month so I have no illusions. What I would like each of you to do, is sign up for a buck a week for six months, one time! Cancel next spring (I will remind you) or keep paying, it is entirely up to you ... with my thanks no matter what you decide. You will see my paywall go up shortly and my plan is after this initial ask, people who simply want my hilarious and fascinating content ... will get it for free. The shopping content will be behind the wall. Again my thanks in advance for your consideration.

A Little More Pond Scum

Not only should Jeanine Pirro not be the Attorney General of the U.S. Justice Department, she should lose her law licence. Her bar association can ask that she present the conclusive evidence that she relied on; to charge David Hearn (an Olympian) with a felony for sabotaging the Washington D.C. reflecting pool. After the charges were dropped, the Republican owner of the company doing the repair came forward and admitted the process they used was experimental and flawed. It gets better. He was working closely with the manager of one of Donnie's golf courses (David Schutzenhofer) who without any any expertise in repairing reflecting pools, was representing the White House and awarded this 14.7 million dollar no bid contract. I hope David Hearn sues them for a hundred million dollars!

Fall Fare

A sure sign of fall in my teen years were canker sores and a pound of butter on the kitchen table. Mom bought field tomatoes by the quart and corn on the cob would arrive for dinner with steady regularity for about six weeks every year. One day, I will share an Austrian recipe that I love for sliced tomatoes but it calls for a very specialized ingredient which is hard to find. This is more of an Italian approach that I tried last week and it is wonderful! Whisk the living shit out of it and the lemon pieces will break down a bit and release more juice. I cut it in half for you:

2 tbsp olive oil
1 ounce water
1 lemon, peeled, seeds removed, finely chopped
1 tea garlic powder, 1 tea onion powder, 1 tea dried oregano,
1/2 tea red pepper flakes, salt and pepper to taste (sometimes a touch of sugar or honey to take the edge off)

Pour it over half a head of romaine lettuce and serve with a thick slice of Calabrese bread, lightly toasted and buttered. It's a last taste of summer in a bowl!

Our Optimum Week

I did that little prime rib in a crockpot on Sunday. It was from our list last week and on for ten bucks a pound. Hell, ground beef is eight? The one I picked had that big arc of fat down the middle and was just over three pounds, so thirty-two bucks. Slathered in garlic butter, I aggressively seared it off in cast iron then deglazed the pan with herbs from the garden and red wine. Three hours on low over a bed or onions. First time I checked it was at 131^o Finito! I rested it for 20 minutes and it came out perfect! What's in the picture was what was left after a small slice for SWMBO and a giant slab for me. Roast beast on a kaiser with lettuce and mayo for a couple of lunches, then hot beef sandwiches. Four meals, best cut of beef money can buy, thirty bucks. Not bad. Quiet on botht eh flyer and offer front but I did get cherry pick a few items for you:

Two For One

Multi-buys are used by just about every chain. Get 2 for $9 or pay $4.99 each. The logic is plain. They know you purchase this product, it encourages you to buy an extra one and put it in the pantry. The competition is locked out for the next cycle. At most chains, the deal is the deal, but Zehr's extends their multi-buys beyond the base count. Here's why it matters. SWMBO's cereal (Oatmeal Crisp) is on, 2 for $9 on the 437 g boxes. So right around a penny per gram. The jumbo box is $12.99 for 958 grams. More expensive right (?) and I need to spend more than $10 to get the points offer on cereal? What to do? Buy 3 of the smaller boxes! Now you have (437 x 3) 1300 grams and got the multi-buy price on all three. Plus you now qualify for two bucks back in points. You went from from 1.4 cents per gram (full price, small box) to 1.2 cents per gram (jumbo box) to 1 cent per gram (sale price) to .8 cents per gram (sale price plus the offer). That's huge.

We Are Watching

Unforgettable on Netflix - Former small town police officer is lured back to the homicide game in the big city. She uses her superpower (not that one) to solve murders and delve into the years old mystery of what happened to her little sister. We are forging through the first season, great supporting cast and so far, so good. Three stars.

Playoff Baseball on all over the place? - We had to use our IPTV service to find TBS for one game, the rest has been on Fox or the sports channels. I understand the desire of the networks to move game times back into primetime but I wonder if that isn't changing. A 07:00 pm start, SWMBO and I might just watch. 8 o'clock, 9 o'clock those advertisers can forget it. I wonder if Teksavvy has a PVR service? Hmm.

... and finally

Doing research on the smash success of A&E's Storage Wars, I ran across some "where are they now" information which I always find instructive:

Dave Hester (the original yuuup guy) ended up unsuccessfully suing the show for "staging" some of the units with amazing "finds". He got popped for $121K in A&E's legal fees but later there was some sort of out of court settlement. It all sounded a little bit shady, which is no surprise with Hester involved.
Daryl Sheets (know as The Gambler) suffered a heart attack in 2019 and committed suicide earlier this year. Horrific online bullying was apparently the cause. A cautionary tale for someone like me.

Dan and Laura Dotson (the head auctioneer and the lady who was paid at the end of each show). Dan suffered a double aneurysm and Laura administered CPR saving his life on their bathroom floor. He was given a 20% chance of surviving the multi-hour surgery and has since made a full recovery and a lifestyle change.
Brandi Passante (I can't remember what she was famous for, oh wait ... I think I remember now?) finally had enough of Jerrod and they split in 2017. She continues with the show in Season 17.